Act of Surrendering

..::*+ Small Talk +*::..

Drinking plain water a lot will cause ulcer? Because I’ve been drinking a lot to recover myself from the sore throat and yet there’s a big ulcer in my mouth. Explanation?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They are standing in the wine field, looking at the sky far away. Ooze flows from their noses. Their body shaking in cold. Their fingers are numb by the frozen blows of the wind. Each holding a camera, they begin to take pictures. Neither of them wants to miss the opportunity to capture that wonderful moment.

Snap!

“It’s nice, isn’t it? I always liked to watch sunset. The scenery is just so wonderful. God surely knows how to create marvelous sceneries, no?”

Joel smiles, and nods his head. He then takes out a packet of tissue, pulling one out of it, and cough right into it. He has been doing it for quite some time already. In fact, he could have been lying on his bed in his room, resting. But he thought that by joining his best pal Evans for a walk his condition might be better. But it turns out, until now at least, that it was a wrong decision – his sickness got worse.

As he is about to throw the used tissue away, something red on the white piece of paper catches his attention. Blood. He is so shocked by it, and his reacts instantly with a shout “Oh my God!”

His friend Evans turns around and looks at him. Although Joel tries to hide away the tissue paper, but he is too slow for that. He is so convinced that Evans saw the whole thing just now, but he acted as if he saw nothing. Evans asks, “are you okay?”

“Yeah, why not? Don’t worry, it’s just a coughing. I’m sick. You know that. Haha!” He tries to force out a smile on his face.

“Well, you look pale. Come,” while pointing at the small brick scout tower, “why don’t we have a rest there?”

“Sounds like a plan,” Joel agrees.

****

They’re now sitting beside the window. Evans is looking and enjoying the scenery from the window of the house while Joel still trying to hide his awkward expression. His brain is still worrying over the tissue paper with blood on it.

Suddenly Evans speaks, “how long have you been sick? Can tell me more about it?”

It’s something awkward. Everyone knows that Joel forbids anyone to ask him about the sickness. Or gossips behind him about his health condition. He is too ashamed of what he has. Because no one else in this world has this kind of weird illness other than him. He has consulted various doctors from East to the West but to no avail. He always feel that he is not a normal human. A spoilt product. But Evans is his very best friend. Someone who never throw him a weird look, no matter how weird he is. No matter how annoying his coughing is. He hesitates for a while.

“Since 7. A week after we first went into primary school. I’ve been traveling all around the world, looking for the best doctors to cure it. But all the doctors said it’s something weird and abnormal. They didn’t tell me directly, of course. I overheard it. And they also said that since I’m the only case so far, they’ll not throw in money to invest on the cure for this illness...”

Tears forms around his eyeframe. Yes, it’s indeed a sad reality of life. Just because he is the only one, he is discriminated. He feels himself worse than the blinds, for at least there are still a lot of people out there who cannot see things. He feels himself worse than the crippled, for at least there are still people out there who are crippled. He feels alone, because he is the only one in this world.

“You’re not alone, Joel, and I think there’s a doctor that I know who can heal you.”

Sparks in Joel’s eyes. “Who could he be?”

“Jesus, our God. You’ve spent lots of money to search for cure for this illness. Isn’t that tiring? You know, God is Yahweh Rophe, which means ‘the God who heals’. Be reminded that Joel also means ‘Yahweh is God’. Have you confess your problems to him and pray that he could heal you?”

“Evans, come on. Let’s be realistic. God to heal? Like miracles that Jesus did as written in the Bible? Don’t make me laugh. Say, there is this guy, who only do God’s things – serving in church, reaching out to people, and so on… On the day of his academic examination, do you seriously think that God will give it a swing and he scores 100% in the exam?”

“Joel, remember that we’re not capable of doing things on our own. Reaching heaven on our own? Escaping our mortality? No these are not possible without God. God doesn’t just judge people on normal standard. He has his own standard. And yes, why not, I guess if one is really doing things for God, it’s possible that God will do that kind of miracles. The question is, have you surrendered your life to God? I’m sure you’ve cried over and over again, asking ‘Why does this happens only on me?’ If you have surrendered yourself to God, I don’t think you’ll be worrying much about this. Because all the things that happened and what is going to happen, God has control on them. There’ll never be a day when God shouts ‘oh my God, this really surprise me!’. What is surrendering to God means then?

Surrendering your life means:

· Following God’s lead without knowing where he’s sending you;

· Waiting for God’s timing without knowing when it will come;

· Expecting a miracle without knowing how God will provide;

· Trusting God’s purpose without understanding the circumstances.

From The Purpose Driven Life Daily Devotional.

Are you following Him? Are you waiting for his timing? Are you expecting miracles from him? Are you trust in God’s purpose? The thing that prevents God from working in us is our stubbornness. Therefore, don’t think that you know God’s plan and starts to act on yourself as if you’re God. Instead, ask Him, pray to Him, so that He will show you his plan. I’m sure God has His own great plans for you. He don’t just throw this disease to you. Look for Him, and ask for the plan to be revealed to you. Bad times don’t just happen. They happen so that you will grow stronger in Christ. For almost 30 years you’ve been carrying this disease. It’s time for you to give in to God, instead of trying to do things on your own. No?”