Beautiful Mess

Today I read through that tiny memory book "Beautiful Forever" again. It has been a while since the last time I reopened that book, but always, I made me smiled and cried at the same time. That is when I was reminded of my dreams 11 years ago; those whom I hold dear to; whose who actually care about me; those who actually don't know me; and lots of promises inside.

One by one I noticed that these memories are fading, but what made my day was that for some I actually remembered every single details of you all. The fact that you're inside the book simply means you are a great treasure of mine.

Call me an emo-freak who holds on to the past very tightly, but I am glad that I read the book again. Somehow, in these waves of stress, I felt relieved and recharged.

'Jesus loves you!'

'路是人走出来的。笑一笑，问题不是问题！'

"immatured"

"Secret keeper"

"鸡犬不宁的小朋友们"

I still remember the Ginseng Soup, the Kampua, about changing my girl's taste, grow taller, the comforter, your tears, your laughters... And I'm not Chiko, in case you still remember that you wrote that! hahhahaha.

owh, just a reminder for all who wanna improve your badminton skills:

To play a good badminton, you must REMEMBER:
1. Masukkan bola
2. Jaga ketinggian bola
3. Sasaran
4. Kelajuan
5. Kekeliruan

Dato' Misbun Sidek, our former national badminton player, said that to me :)

My coach's advice:

5Ss:
1. Speed
2. Skill
3. Strength
4. Self-control
5. Stamina


it's a 11-years of memories. And it lifted me up. Now. I will continue to push forward. I will press on. I will try and keep trying, even at times it is tiring and worthless. I will not give up. Not now. Nor in the future.

also to notice how God started to work in me. Through all these wonderful peoples.

got sticky on my monitor: Don't waste your time on unnecessary stuffs! Set goal for each day! Not just try, but accomplish them!

aza aza hwaiting.

Auf geht's!

L1

Lesson of the day:

You don't try to do something. You ACCOMPLISH them.

23 to 23rd.

I want to be:

1. A king

2. A warrior

3. A mentor

4. A friend


--

Exams are coming up. Lesser internet, but more books. More past years. More more.

Help me remember of number 23:-

1. Psalm 23 -

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want;

He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

he restores my soul,
he guides me in paths of righteousness, for his name's sake;

Even though I walk through the valley of shadow of death,
I will fear no evil, for You are with me;
Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.


You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows.

Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Psalm 23:1-6 NIV

2. Day 23 of Fireproof -

Day 23 of the Love Dare: Beware of parasites! A parasite is anything that latches onto you or your partner and sucks the life out of your marriage (or relationship with God/people) they usually comes in form of addictions, like alcohol, gambling, pornography.

They promise pleasure, but grow like a disease and consume more and more of your thoughts, time and money. They steal away your loyalty and heart from those you love.

Marriage (or relationship) rarely survive if parasites are present. If you love your wife, you must destroy any addiction that has your heart. If you don't, it will destroy you. 

"So if the Son sets you free, you will be freed indeed."

John 8:36 NIV

3. Day 23 of Purpose Driven Life - God wants you to grow.

4. 23 ;)

I want to be ready. And I want this to work. I want God to start work in me. I want God to continue to be with him. I'm so glad that Jesus is here in my house.

Keep me in prayers, I'm going through hard times now.

Try - Jesse Barrera

This song can sing for various occasions inside me now.



or better this more emo album version:



Click the Play button to play the song!


Try - Jesse Barrera


[Verse1]
So this is it
The final curtain call
My time here is over
I wish it was for good
This is goodbye
The final wave of hand
I wish I had the nerve
To say that I'm never coming back
It was a fight
I cried myself to sleep
For so many nights, I can't believe
That I've grown to be a boy
With nothing to my name
Except a guitar and no one else to blame


[Chorus]
But I hope you know I try
Hope you know I try, to become a better man
I hope you know I never meant to hurt you
Never meant to make you cry
I hope you know I try
Hope you know I try, to become a better man
But with you in my life,
I don't think I ever can.
(did I ever can?)


[Verse2]
The roadway is waiting
And I'm stuck debating
If I ever want to see you again
Cause I've grown numb
This city means nothing without the love we used to have
And this is goodbye
The final wave of hand
I wish I had the nerve
To say that I'm never coming back again
Yeah, again


I try. And I tried. Did I ever can...? Sigh.

Movie "Fireproof" and song "While I'm Waiting"

Today's Hausgemeinde-Treffen we watched this movie called "Fireproof". It's a story about two souls who were at the edge of ending their marriage, but because of the guy allow himself to be changed by God, and so his marriage and his wife as well. Great movie, if there's a movie that I would rate 10/10, this is the only movie that I would give this rating. Highly recommended for all people out there who wants to understand Jesus and why must he had to die on the cross.

This is the one of the soundtracks of the movie, titled "While I'm waiting". Highly recommended as well =)

While I'm Waiting - John Waller




[Verse1]
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

[Pre-Chorus]
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Takeing every step in obedience

[Chorus]
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

[Verse2]
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait


Do go buy the movie and watch it over and over and over and over and over and over again!

乱！

到了某个转弯点，人都会累的。
劝告说了很多次，若还是耳边风，人都会累的。
心等久了，若还是无声无息，人都会累的。
当英雄无用武之地，人都会累的。


放弃？还是坚持？

满足，慢足，还是瞒足？
*瞒足，就是隐瞒心中的满足感，继续努力，我自己的新字*

繁忙，还是烦忙？
*烦忙，就是烦恼自己的忙碌，也是我自己的新字*


开心，还是打开心？

累了，还是泪了？



或许，这种感想是坚持的心必须付出的代价。

加油祈豪，祈豪是佳油。
*佳油，最佳的油品？就是 cream of the creams 的意思啦。:)


今天上了IPEF (Integration Produktentwicklung und -Fertigung ) 这堂课，教授说到关于一个好的领袖应该拥有的品德。昨晚 CG 时崇义做了一个很好的标题：对次等级已满足？相信神能给予你更好。突然间发觉，自己真的很多弱点，自己真的不像一位领袖，自己很容易对小小的成就就有了心满意足的感觉。我发觉，自己的推动力不强，怕独行。

也不知为什么的，神就是偏偏要夺走自己荣耀的那些强项。还记得想当年，我告诉自己，每一年在德国的马来西亚生羽球比赛都要得冠，神就偏偏安排时间让我死去这条心，这次还让我的手腕断了骨。从小到大我的眼睛一向都没问题。还记得以前我问了妈妈，为什么很多人都要戴眼镜，因为只要改一改眼视膜，视线不就回到原本吗？还嘲笑那些戴眼镜的人。结果神就把我弄瞎了自己就的了近视。想来想去，只觉得，下一步应该学的是中庸吧？

小小的感想，本来不想写得这么长的，结果。。。。。。　唉！