Emo-ness + Friends

Feeling is such a complicated matter. Although it has been nearly half a year since I broke up with her, yet in these few days that emotion suddenly came back into me. I was down, my heart as if made a somersault. I don’t know why it came back to me again, but definitely it wasn’t what I wanted. Tears rolled down from my cheek, suddenly. I suddenly lost interest in everything. I really thought I might have gone crazy like last time again.

But to my greatest relief, it was a huge difference between this time and the previous ones. I’m not alone to get through everything this time. Just when I needed it the most, God came to me with the friends that I’ve made. I was touched.

My ALG coursemates came to me with great support. Daniel offered me great hand and a wonderful plan. Xiang Yu gave me a great assurance of something that surely you won’t want to hear about. Pau… although not much, but with his that piece of voice and his song that he never sing to anyone else, that really cheered me up, a lot.

Danke sehr~

Next up, the Koreans, you all are just as wonderful as you all are! A warm thanks to Michelle, for being a great listener as I poured out everything that came in my heart. All the sadness… it felt just great to tell out your personal feelings and she being able to give many advices. Just that, don’t go around her asking for details what I told her, I believe I have her trust not to tell anyone about it. It’s nice to have someone as my own secret keeper, after so many years I’ve become one of others. Second credit goes to Dena, another good listener, or rather, good reader (as we messaged each other). Well, I can’t remember how it started, but I told her about my emo-ness through Short Message Service (SMS). She basically no experience of the feeling of breaking up, but the cheers and advices really did made my feeling a great boost. Next up, Anna, for SMS me so late just now (2am, 10^th Nov, GMT +8.00), just to cheer me up with forward messages. I like this SMS of hers the best:

哪有眼睛，不曾流过泪？

哪有笑容，背后没有创伤？

哪有成长，不经千锤百链？

哪有成功，没有遭受挫折？

但愿你能平安，顺利，开心，让神带领你每一天。

To be honest, this was the reason I’m staying awake now (2.22am) just to finish this entry, although yesterday I just posted up one.

Kamsahamnida~

Not forgetting is my ex-schoolmate, Usiana. Hey, to be honest, she was the Hermione Granger of my school last time. PTS “jumper”, 1^st in every year throughout the whole secondary school times, oh ya, just that she did not go to library whenever she faces problem (if she’ll ever face one), partly because the library was never giving any useful help, although she’s a bit short and what Ah Do always tease her last time – 一仙五角. Go and figure out what that means. Haha! But but but, she was another one that I poured out everything to and also, another great advisor. I remembered last time the only help that she asked from me was to give her advice on what she should do during a 拉票 sorts of thingy for President of Student Council, if I’m right about this. It is now still clearly in my mind that during that time I gave her lots of lame and nearly useless ideas. But today, although we’re far apart, she understood everything when we chatted through MSN and gave me advices as we discussed my problem.

Kai Chiat, you’re next! Yup, we also talked about my problem when we chatted.

You better get rid of her.

Simple, yet that’s the truth of what I really should do now. Actually there were still lots of friends that I talked to. Many of them gave constructive advices. Something that I really thank God. I have lots of friends. I know, I won’t be alone all the time.

I was shocked of myself that the emo came back to me again, when I was sure that I shook it off from me. Has it been tailing me since then? However, I’m not afraid, nor sad. No,not this time. It’s just not this time. I got tons of friends cheering me up, supporting me. My wonderful friends.

So emo emo, shoooooooooooooooooooooooooo~

Go away, get out from me, don’t come back to me and better, don’t exist.

Vincent