爱的眼泪

..::*+ 前言 +*::..
从巴黎回来，很累了。拍了400++照片，如何整理？辛苦辛苦...

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有时候，我真的很失望：为什么当初我这么冲动...
有时候，我真的想回到过去，抹去我们之间有过的感情...
有时候，我真的不想再见到你，虽然我现在对你还是会有一点动心...
有时候，我真的不想和你吵架、憎恨、发脾气、不耐烦...
有时候，我真得很怀念当时那甜蜜蜜的感觉...
有时候，我真的还想再叫你一声“宝贝”...
有时候，我真的觉得初恋是一幅难忘的回忆...

20080422...
一年了...
已一年了...
我单身已一年了...
我终于发现我单身已一年了...

你还记得吗?

你眼中的笑容，告诉我你已忘记了;
你心里的幸福，告诉我你并不怀念;
你和他的拥抱，告诉我你活得安好;
你和他的接吻，告诉我你桃花满满;

或许你并不在乎我这个人物，
或许你不怀念我们这段回忆，
或许你一直以来都瞧不起我，
或许你根本都不曾恩爱过我，

她叫他“宝贝”，使我想起了你。
他们拖着得小手，使我想起了你。
他们的完美婚姻，使我想起了你。

他送你的一朵花，使我想起我们的十八朵玫瑰。
他握着你的小手，使我想起当年你滑嫩嫩的手。
他和你，使我想起了你和我...

我放弃了吗？
我告诉我自己，我放弃。
但有时候，
你的一举一动、
你的每句话语、
你的每幅眼神，

那感觉仍然还留在那儿。

爱，真的不简单。

我，其实不想分手。
我，其实不想分开。
我，其实不想忘记。
我，其实不想不爱。
我，其实不想去想。
我，其实仍然怀念。
我，其实很想退后。
我，其实很多借口。
我，其实也哭了很多。

你，接受我，因为你不想孤独。
你，爱上我，因为你别无选择。
你，瞧低我，因为年龄区别大。
你，嫌弃我，因为我不过他好。

我，爱上你，因为我对你动心。
我，表了白，因为我想陪陪你。
我，拖你手，因为想相扶到老。
我，原谅你，因为害怕失去你。

我，学着放弃你，也是因为我太爱你。

离开吧，我不想再见到你...



祈豪

A brief update of Pfingsten part 1

Came back from Festival 2008. Summary:-

Super fun.

Super enjoyable.

Indescribable.

Wonderful.

Tears.

Cry.

Worship.

Prayers.

Workshops.

Songs.

Sermons.

Alsbald Predigen.

Hope for Malaysian.

Evangelism.

Stronger.

Tougher.

Awake.

Thoughts.

Bad German language.



Tired.


tomorrow Paris - Tired. Full coverage of das Festival 2008 after I come back from Paris. Expected to wait long time before it is posted up. Expected to be corrected if wrong, my German is very very very very bad.

Happy Mothers' Day~

..::*+ Small Talk +*::..
Not sure whether this will work or not, but anyway, just try out. Anyway, hehe. This post was created on 20080508 and was subjected to be posted on 20080511.

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Mommy, I know I'll not be around this weekend to chat with you. I don't know if I can manage to make a ring for you that day. But, I just want to wish, at here, from the bottom of my heart, that I have a mommy like you~

So here goes...


HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY TO YOU!


Hope everything will go fine with you, no matter dealing with people, or work, or that little brother's temper, I just want to wish you all the best, mommy. Wish to send you something through ebay or Amazon, but too late. The chocolate I wanted to buy and send to you, but I think it will melt. T,T

Anyway, take care and all the best, Mom~

eine Woche =/= eine sehr erwartende Woche

..::*+ Small Talk +*::..
Sorry my blog starting to turn into a daily diary. I can't help it, thoughts just running through my mind and I don't want to loose any of them.

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I want to cry. Things just flushing into my mind. Some updates about my grandpa. He's still coma and doctor asked to discharge him. Excuses given by hospital managements. I began to think, how things should go on?
*updates: Discharge because hospital no enough place.*

Err.. good excuse. Are Malaysians so sickening? Sounds like they are. =.=


Paris trip... What will be there waiting for me? I just feel I'm dumb enough; I suppose to have a good week to catch-up my studies yet I chose to throw it away. There goes my week. Bye...

...

...

I want to study Polardarstellungen, I want to Study Matrizen, I want to study Umprojizieren, I want to study technishes Zeichnen, I want to do Mathematik Übungsaufgaben, I want to do Physik Übungsaufgaben, I want to draw my Umprojizieren Übungen.. I want.. I want.. *endless.

She doubted if she'll fail her exam. I doubted myself too. I've heard stories about how nice lecturers treating us the Malaysische Studenten. But, I want to get the Schein (Pass) with real effort, not mercies from other people. Yet I faked out to be strong. To be sure. I faked.

How can I do it without You? Wie kann ich meine Klausuren bestehen, ohne Du mir die Kräfte gibst? Ich weiß, dass ich nichts schaffen kann, wenn ich alle selbst mache. Deshalb bitte ich Deinen Kraft, Vater, dass Du mir immer unterstützen. Hebst du mir hoch auf, Vater. Du wieß, dass ich schwach bin. Du weiß auch, dass ich immer Lügen erzähle. Aber ich weiß, dass Du mich niemals aufgibst. Deshalb bitte ich, Vater, mir Kräfte zu geben.

Gern will ich weinen. Aber mein Vertrauen ist immer mit Dir. Nie kann es wegnehmen =)

Schade, dass ich undeutliches Kurztext schreiben kann. Schade, dass mein Deutsch schlecht ist. Es könnte besser sein, oder?


Vincent

我真的不管不管不管不管不管不管不管啦~

..::*+ 前言 +*::..
看来我还会在这个周末继续更新部落。好想尝试 blogger 的新 feature。对不起，忘了华语。

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够了，祈豪。够了！够了。够了。够了。够了！

玩了这么多，去了这么多地方，花了这么多时间。。。 够了，祈豪。难道你还玩不够吗？别人都在拼命苦读，力争上游，你却整天吊儿郎当，做事不认真，不专心。上课打瞌睡，不听课。不然就翘课，逃学。头脑里都是游戏、玩乐、消遣、吃喝。。。

是该时候停止了吧？政府送你到德国的主要目的是读书，不是玩耍。难道这些是你的梦想么？难道你忘了你和朋友们一点零的耀眼成绩么？难道你忘了你自己对神的诺言么？

可笑。。。真是可笑。自己一个华人在别人的地盘、班上、活动，你可真的忘了你自己啊！是该时候回头了吧？是该时候回到神的旁边吧？是该时候对自己说，“对对对，我要回我原本的自己”了吧？是该时候说，“神，我要向你告白我所有的过错”了吧？是时候该说，“神，你的存在就是我的力量”了么？是该时候努力求学了吧？那小学成绩顶呱呱的你，难道自从上了中学就没声没息了么？你就是那么笨么？

回到过去，是她先放弃你，还是你先放弃了你自己？她为什么放弃了你？她为什么放弃你？每一样事情的发生，难道你自己就没责任承担么？读书吧，祈豪！努力吧，祈豪！加油吧，祈豪！你自己的未来，你自己来添彩。别为了别人而放弃自己所要去的方向。别为了那些虚假的诱惑而放弃自己的希望。爱情，你自己都搞不顶，还要去照顾别人？你付得起这种责任么？一句“我爱妳”，你这么简单就想说了出来？为了别人而放弃自己的人则？你是随缘，还是随便？别绕着别人而周转。绕着你的神来运转，祈求祂取之不尽，用之不竭的力量，寻找祂完美的国宝，散播祂耀眼的光芒，唱出祂动人的声音，不是更好么？

看看你自己，眼泪是不是想流下来？

还在梦里的你，清醒了吧？该清醒的你，是否该开始跨出那第一步了吧？还是那胆小的你，心中还在犹豫、害怕？

不必惧怕，亲爱的祈豪。与神的同在，我们一起走完这条路，好吗？

你准备好了吗？




祈豪

Das Festival 2008

..::*+ Small Talk +*::..
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.
Colossians 3:15

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Matthew 6:33


I want to find my peace with God, people and situations. =)

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Well, it's been great to have you all as my readers. I know how NOT-important I am, thanks to Dena, but anyway, just want to inform you all that I will not be updating my blog for around a week. So when I'm away, remember to pray for my safety ya~

Not travelling again?

You really very rich!

Why don't you buy souvenirs for us instead?


Yes I'm away for travelling again. But no, I'm at the edge of bankruptcy. Then again, just to inform you all that I'll be going for Das Festival 2008, a church camp. It will be my first church camp since I accepted Christ and it will be a big big one - A camp with Christians from whole Germany. I'll be leaving this Friday and will be back on the following Monday. After that I'll be going Paris, don't know if I have enough time and money for everything or not though. Anything you want from Paris? =P

Anyway, let's talk about some mentality that I should prepare for this camp. First of all, why choose to go camp?

Let's make it a positive pressure for ourselves. You go for the camp probably because your Cell Group leader asked you to go, and you don't know how to decline the invitation. Anyway, why Festival?

• Festival is a chance created by God for us to know Him better. Through meetings and gatherings of people we can actually learn more about Him and His glory can be clear to everyone. Further more, we can also spread His glory. And our God please to see everyone gather around for Him.
  
• Festival is also an event that is good for me myself.
  
  (1) It's the time when I can receive: The more time I spend with God, the more time for me to receive His blessings. I might find answers to my doubts and thoughts and burdens and weaknesses.
  
  (2) Set goal for myself: Goals that I want to achieve through God. Goals that I want to reach in the Festival.
  
  (3) Chance to give: It is a chance to serve and to make full use of our talents in glorifying His name. It'll be also a chance where you receive confirmation from other people about what you have given. In Acts 20:35 it stated: It is more blessed to give than to receive. Therefore I should open my eyes to help out.
  
  (4)We can achieve things together.
  
  And for that, Ka Jin, our grand *2³ senior, who is 8 years older than me, gave us five tips of preparation:
  
  1. Pray: Pray for ourselves and other people as well.
  2. Set goals: Set goals for ourselves during the Festival. Who do I want to talk to? Keeping contacts with others even after Festival. Encourage ourselves and other people in life.
  3. Prepare some testimonies: So that we can share and listen to others' testimonies and better not last-minute preparation.
  4. Prepare some questions to ask other people: It might be simple as "How do you come to know about Christ?" It can also be as hard as "What's your most difficult time in life?" It's all about what you want to learn from others.
  5. Set "appointments" with other people. Try to arrange some time with other people to share and learn more about each others' life. Make use of opportunities to grow ourselves up.
  
• Festival is also good for others:
  (1) Think like this: Everyone could benefit from me. Thus we should be more open and ready to share life and experiences with others. We influence the people and atmosphere.
  
  (2) Watch out of other people: Try to meet the needs so that the conversation can continue to flow.
  
  (3) Hook up with other people. Gain contacts.
  

After Festival: Prepare yourself, because you will experience from "heaven" during the camp changing to "hell" after the camp. Therefore learn to write down what you learnt during the camp. Convert them into goals in your life. Make them practical. Besides, keep in touch with other people that you know during the festival. This is a way to encourage and watch out each other after the camp.

How much we gain from the camp depends on how good we make it =)

Go, because of God.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heartm as working for the God, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.
Colossians 3:23-24

Serving God,
Vincent


p/s: Ka Jin has wonderful testimonies that I'm trying to get appropriate time to listen to. Might include in future post. He started Hoffung/Hope Stuttgart, by the way.

p/s: Paris trip... Hope it would be nice. h-o-p-e

Köln Trip~

..::*+ Small Talk +*::..
Gosh~ I should start to consider eating grass so that I won't blow my bank account up.

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It was another wonderful weekend again. Alright alright, I went travelling again. Yeps. And don't envy me because of that, or else you should join me eating grass and flowers =.=

I went to Köln, or Cologne. It was another exciting trip. Jia Jin drove us up. Daniel came to my place in the evening of Thursday(20080501) and the next day morning, around 9:30am, we loaded stuffs into our rented car and after making sure everything was done, we hopped into the Germany-origined car. BMW 3 Series.


A Corvette we met during our journey. Reminded me of NFS: Most Wanted.

The ride took us around 3 and half hours to reach Köln. I really thank God because of His blessings, we had a smooth and no-traffic-jam journey to Köln. So after we reached there, we went to check-in for Jia Jin. After that, we took U-Bahn (Underground train) to the Hauptbahnhof (Main train station). After that, we went for lunch at KFC. It was located in Hohe Straße ( High Street), and it was really packed up with people. It was a street where you can find most of the shops there, from Gucci to Lego, you name it. Yes, even Lego has its own shop there.
So after lunch we went to 相亲 - to find my "wife". And I can tell you, it was not a pretty task. We search the whole way from near to far, east to west, to the Rhein river, in the end, the MusicsStore was just not far away from the train station. We stepped in, and I found my loveS. Yes, my loveS. I don't know which one to choose. The choice was sooooooo many, and in the end I picked one, who was not that expensive. I can't afford a luxurious wife. I no money okie. So, I picked a €258 worth wife, found a nice clothing for her, and a good stand, so that I can boast her around.


In total, she worthed €305,45. My love~ Hehe.





Then we bidded goodbye to Jia Jin, and Daniel and I walked around the city ourselves. We went to check-in at our hostel, then we went for some souveniors. Took a glance at the Dom, the highest building in Köln. It was quite sad because we couldn't climb up to the top that day - it was closed. So we went on to search for other nice places. We walked across the Rhein River. Around 8pm, we went to the EdenGarten - a korean/japanese buffet restaurant. It costed €12,50 each, but it was quite worth it because we ate a lot. Okie fine, I ate a lot.






I ate a lot, till my stomach was so big, and the food was like boiling inside, feel like vomitting. So, with a pregnant stomach, I went back to hostel. Played 2 games of DotA against AI, and cleaned up and slept.

So the next day we woke up around 10:20am, checked out and went to Barbarossaplatz, the nearest U-Bahn Station. We needed a one-day-ticket, so we found ourselves a ticket-machine, pressed for the ticket, and I threw all the 5 pieces of €2 inside, without noticing the machine was mulfunctioned. So, similar methaphor would be throwing a piece of RM50 into Sarawak River, or Selat Johor, or whatever. Sigh.

I had to spend €2,50 on fries and used €20 note so that I could have coins again. Sigh, learnt from lesson, and bought the ticket IN the train. We took train to HeuMarkt Station, and our 1st event of the journey started...

Entrance of the Chocolate Museum. Yes, we visited Köln most famoused Schokolademuseum.

I felt proud when reading the geographical info about cocoa.



M-A-L-A-Y-S-I-A

And I would say the museum was nice, although I had to pay extra because I did not bring my student ID card.A lotus pond inside the museum.

More chocolates... Oh yea, if you jealoused, congratulation, I achieved my target. Muahaha. Anyway, treat me nice, when I go find you all then I might remember to bring some. Haha.

Warmest loves from Germany, hehe...

Chocolates...

Chocolates chocolates...

Chocolates chocolates chocolates...

Chocolate flowers...

I love you so much :P


Then we went to a garden. Yea yea, actually we wanted to go zoo, but someone did not bring student ID, and the price difference was sooooo big.





Yes, then we went to climb the Dom. Here's some info about it:

Tall: 157 m
Steps of staircase: 509
Climb height: 100 m
Time to climb up and come down: 3o min.

Cool eh?

Some view about from the top of the tower...
You Who wrote this??? LoL. =.=
A bell in the tower.

Alright, this was interesting. They looked so real, don't they?






They are real ok, real living human.

Anyway, after that we took train to Leverkusten to meet Jia Jin. This was our Köln trip. After that we went up to Essen, to Mülheim, to meet the founder of Hoffnung Stuttgart, and to meet outstanding, wonderful and successful Malaysians. Anyway, it would be in the other post, here marks the end of Köln trip. But I tell you, I will come back again someday, for the zoo and the aquarium, at least.

For more pictures, please visit 88ultimatepichu88. My pictures are there. All pictures are originally posted and none are edited.


Vincent